The new year has started out pretty good for me. I have gotten
a new car, color, black, what else;) I also started a new job last
week. Not the most perfect job, but I make decent money.
Last week was a learning trail and error thingy. I have been
self conscious about myself and making mistakes, feeling some
anxiety and unsure of myself. I can be kinda a perfectionist,
be hard on myself, and I hate that I put myself through unnecessary
shit! I know I am just feeling myself around my new surroundings,
and it will take time. I guess I am just scared of making mistakes or
failures. I know none of us are perfect and I should just give myself
time, BUT damn I am a worry wart LOL!!! I will take many deep
Every since Sunday something within me has felt off,
unbalanced. I have felt this way before and I hate it.
It feels like a oppression, some type of darkness, fog
rolling around in my mind and thoughts. I could be just my
nerves and anxiety getting the best of me. I will definitely
pray about it, and a firm believer that prayer does, and has
worked in my life. Even dark angels pray;)….
Last Friday night I went to a tattoo parlor and got my
nose pierced. I have no idea what I was thinking that
it would be done like having your ears pierced…NOT!
It hurt like hell, and I was a real trooper:). It hurt so bad it
made my eyes water. I wanted it done because I thought
girls with them looked cute, maybe, it’s just a mid-life
crisis, who knows, but I still look cute LOL!!
I really think all I am doing though is exploring myself,
letting my real personality come out because growing up
I think I felt caged, too insecure, and now I feel like I know
myself more and feel secure enough to let my weirdness
shine, be who I am. I have my insecurities like everyone,
have my good and my bad days, and I know whatever
funk I am in, this too shall pass…..
Posted by angelicdarkness70 in Uncategorized
January 20, 2015 at 5:33 p01
Hugs:) i bet your nose is adorable:)